The Dark Knight

Holy f@ck, Batman!!

Before I give you my rave review, let's hear what others had to say about this movie:

"This movie was, like, the BEST movie, like, EVER! I wouldn't consider this movie a superhero movie. I wouldn't even consider it an action movie. It was just an overall, excellent, well-made crime caper. When you see a work of art, you just wanna watch it over and over and over...kinda like watching my well-toned a$$..." - THomas "Buns of Steel" K.

"I be like a true Batman fan, you know. I be watchin' dat $hit back in the day when dey had all dem cheesy sound effex. Bam! Ka-pow!! You know dat $hit, right? So I wuz lovin' dat movie, boy! Let me tell ya...and dat Joker??!! Whoooooooeeeeeeyyyy!! Dat boooey deserve an Oscar or 40 oz or sum'n sum'n!!" - LWeb, co-teacher

"A true dick flick. Action-packed and entertaining, but not moving. I'd rather watch P.S. I Love You..." - D Teezee, dick flicker

"Thith movie wath, perhapth, the greateth thingle thing ever made thinth thlithed bread. The Joker's voith and mannerithimths reminded me of my huthband. My huthbandth's bringing thexy back! And tho ith thith new Batman movie. Outthanding!! Thintilating!! Batman can thurely kick Thupermanth's ath!!" - ??????

And there you have it, folks. Everyone's agreed. Batman is the movie pick of the summer.

Here's what I think:

Great acting (Christian Bale, Morgan Freeman, Heath Ledger, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Michael Caine, Aaron Eckhart, Gary Oldman...) Tons of kick-ass action and cool Batman gadgets for the guys. Heath Ledger for the girls. (Ooooh, I can imagine the latest, creepy role-playing going on in bedrooms everywhere...) Great, dark setting. The Batcycle. Christopher Nolan should get more credit for making Memento and reviving the Batman movies. The Joker was (if you haven't, for some reason, heard the hype yet) truly AWESOME.

I heard some people say that the movie might be a little long, but I was engaged the entire way. I had to really take a piss afterwards, but I was thoroughly entertained. Maybe you can bring a bottle or just piss in your popcorn bucket after you've eaten it all. Then, just leave it in the theaters. Don't feel guilty. That's what they get for robbing us every time we buy a movie ticket and their overpriced snacks.

I'm not going to reveal any of the plot because this post is becoming too long, and it's better if you just go and see it. This movie was definitely the best movie I've seen this summer. Near-perfect. A tiny smidge above Wall*E. I give this movie BAM! two more sequels KA-POW!! and no mention of Alicia Silverstone playing Fatgirl...